Tech Sales Hunter
Getting to the Truth – #2
My previous posting was the first of a series of techniques to get to the truth with prospects, clients, and candidates. These techniques aren’t foolproof, but they significantly increase the likelihood of finding out the other person’s real intent. Here’s the 2nd truth tip:
“Appeal to their nobler motives.”
In How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie notes that we tend to try to live up to others’ expectations and to our own high regard for ourselves. He gives examples of how murderous gangsters consider themselves good, caring, decent men.
In Influence, The Psychology of Persuasion, Robert Cialdini takes a different tact on that concept, citing experiments that show how far people will go to be consistent in their self-images. Like Carnegie, Cialdini gives examples showing that most of us consider ourselves “good” people & we strive to maintain that self image, at least in our own mind’s eye.
So, as Carnegie advises, appeal to others’ nobler motives. Make it clear that you perceive your prospects and clients as people of high character, people who can be counted on to do the right thing. In many cases, they will live up to your expectations.
By the way, it helps to clarify what “the right thing” is, just in case you & they have different definitions.
I want to address another point about you telling the truth in these circumstances. You may be thinking that it would be manipulative or duplicitous to tell people that you assume they’ll do the right thing if you don’t think they will. I believe it’s fair to assume people will treat us fairly until they prove otherwise. And, certainly, you should be cautious when you first encounter someone or when you haven’t dealt with them in depth.
My question is: If you don’t believe someone is dealing fairly with you, why would you work with them? If, in fact, clients or candidates purposely lie or act unethically, you have a decision to make about whether you’re willing to continue working with them .
If you or your company are willing to do so, there’s another book you might want to read, called (pardon the coarseness) The No Asshole Rule, by Robert Sutton. Maybe it’s time we take a stand against putting up with those types of people & companies. I’m aware that dropping an unpleasant client or candidate can be a torturous decision. And that is a topic for another time.
More truth tips to come. . . .
